It has now been 4 months since I left my office job and started working with animals. I’m doing more hours because it feels more important too me but when I nearly burst into the tears the other day when one of our dogs cried in pain, I knew I had to have a break and focus on my self-care. If I can’t be there both mentally and physically for the animals then I am not just failing myself but also them. 

In this busy world of achieving with everything happening instantly, it’s easy to forget that we are not machines and need to take a break sometimes. Many cultures do not promote the importance of self-care but on the contrary, encourage us to ‘keep going’ and to ‘keep striving’. Of course there is merit in this and achieving is important but it is equally vital to remember self-care. Only with rested bodies, minds and souls can we truly achieve. And yet, how many of us are over-worked and stressed? Do we really have time to stop and appreciate a flower, a bird, a blue sky…?

What does self-care actually involve? 

I now finally realise how counterproductive my previous so-called coping habits were. Whilst working in corporate, I would indulge into more glasses of wine or beer than I care to remember. Now that I’m not drinking so much I can actually feel the difference when I do have a few drinks. I am extremely anxious the following day and can barely focus on what’s important.

Focusing on healthy coping strategies has become a key part of my day now. Healthy coping strategies are so much more than just taking a break and range from physical, emotional (yes, you guessed it – journaling), social to intellectual, such as learning a new hobby, and sensory, such as music or scented candles. Everyone’s self-care is different and of course there is probably some trial and error involved but here is what seems to working for me and hopefully some people might resonate with this list: 

1- Awareness through Journaling

I used to work crazy hours and function on adrenalin alone. Being aware of my body telling me that I need to sleep has been a huge shift in my way of thinking. And accepting that it’s ok to sleep and rest has also been a huge relief. I can therefore listen to my thoughts more clearly and by journaling daily, I can now observe my thoughts and emotions and let them go more confidently. By becoming more aware, I can react less and connect to my body and be better prepared for knowing what it needs. Journaling is in fact one of the most powerful tools to becoming aware and less overwhelmed. Of course, don’t fall into the trap of wallowing in negative thoughts but use it to offload your mind and to find a way forwards. Try it with some useful prompts.

One of my other favourite easy exercises to bring you back into your awareness of the moment is the 5-4-3-2-1. Try it, it’s so easy: at any moment, name 5 things you can see, 4 things you can feel, 3 you can hear, 2 you can smell and 1 that you can taste. And, believe it or not, it’s fun noticing the world around you!

2- Congratulate Yourself 

Many of us are hard on ourselves and we tend to forget that we have usually already achieved a lot. Small wins happen everyday and acknowledging them is also important to feel that we are progressing and contributing. I find it also helps me stop focusing on the negative and I then realise that there is a lot of positive I also bring. 

3- Hobbies (including sleep!) 

As a typical workaholic, this is one area that often suffers but it is actually so rewarding for me when I can balance hobbies with work, both mentally and physically. Hobbies are such a great way to connect with other people and to find more meaning in life. Good food, exercise, music, art, poetry readings, animals, etc, etc are all powerful connections to what it means to being human. And these days, we can also find so much online…

4- Time to Sit with Oneself – Meditation 

Meditation has been a life-changing experience and whilst I can’t pretend to be an expert, it has helped me become calmer and more accepting of myself. Self-Care is about having compassion with oneself and appreciating oneself. If I can’t even sit with myself then how could I also take care of myself or expect anyone else to? 

And if meditation seems like to big a leap then just take a breath and listen to your body. It’s that simple. Before you sit down to your coffee or your emails or before you walk out the house, just take a deeeeep breath that you can feel all the way into your body. It feels good, if nothing else.

5- Rewards

And of course we all need a pat on the back sometimes. Doing that with ourselves allows us to develop internal approval. I have found rewards by spending time in nature and with people which has been both uplifting and humbling. I am still finding my rewards, including taking a break, going for a walk, listening to music, calling a friend or other ideas from this blog. Taking time to appreciate what is around me has also been powerful in helping me gain a healthier perspective.